Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Damn It

I know that one day it will be alright.  That I'll be better.  But damn it, I don't want to be alright without her.  I don't want to be better without her. 

It'll happen after I haven't thought about her in for a while.  I'll realize I haven't thought about her.  That I've been okay.  And I'll probably cry one last time.  But I'll know I'm going to be okay after that. 

I just can't imagine not thinking about her.  I've got a year and eight months of memories of us together running through my head. 

I see blue eyes, I think of her.  I smell the perfume she wore, and I think of her.  I lay in my bed, and I remember her sleeping next to me.  I cook, and I remember us cooking together and how much she loved it. 

I want her, and I need her.  I just wish things could have been different.  I wish being with me had made her as happy as being with her made me.