Sunday, January 11, 2009

Observations on....Me!!


Lately I've been noticing a little change in me. I guess it really seemed to start with the New Year. New Years Eve I came to a couple of realizations, or at least made myself admit to some things that have been all too clear and that I've been ignoring for all to long. And then I just went with it.

And I'm...happy. Very happy. And I feel like there is a deep well of happiness within in me that I've barely begun to tap. It's a weird experience, but I'm enjoying it for what it is, and I want to share it with everyone else who is where I am. I'm taking advantage of all the positives I can, and I'm letting the negatives roll off as best I can.

I still have my dark, brooding moments. Those are just a part of me that aren't going anywhere. I feel it's necessary to recognize the negatives and acknowledge them for what they are, and I take the time to do that. But they're not dragging me down. They don't hover around me like some dark cloud of doom.

I feel like I'm doing something. Yes. Action. It's making me feel great. I don't know that it will last, but I know it's there, always has been, and I know I've just got to tap it to get back here. So, I'm taking the good and running with!

And when/if the bad comes, I'll fight it like I always do. And I'll either conquer it or I'll learn from my defeat and go on. What the hell else can I do?

It's not in me to become jaded about life. Maybe I've been lucky enough to avoid the worst that can happen. I don't know. I just know this is the correct state of being and to live any other way is not right. So when I'm here, I'll enjoy, and when I'm not I'll work to get back here. Yep.


Ave said...

That's the kind of positive outlook I like to see. :)

Action makes all the difference, doesn't it? It's like, when we can't do anything about something, it really drags us down and makes us feel helpless. But when we're working toward something and we feel like we're making an impact, at least in our own lives, it just lets us see that even if we aren't where we want to be, we're at least getting there. Uplifting, isn't it? :)

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Yes, it is very uplifting!