Thursday, February 24, 2005

Blah

Today started out kind of nice.  I woke okay.  Stephanie called me a few minutes before I left for class to ask me a question while she was studying.  She had to make up our last Existentialsim test.  Classes were okay, but boring.  On my way home I called Stephanie to ask her how she thought she did.  She said she probably made a B on it.  She'll find out next Wednesday.

Tomorrow is the day I start work.  I'm nervous as hell, but it's not really all from that.  My grandfather called me this afternoon.  He wanted to know where my $25,000 CD (certificate of deposit) went.  It was in our safe deposit box, but I took it and cashed it when I moved out.  I needed the money, not all of it, but it was all mine.  Most of it is gone now.  I've been living off it since I moved out.  I had to furnish an apartment, pay rent, and pay a lot of bills with it.  I also used part to get a new car.  It's my only luxury now. 

Anyway, he wasn't happy.  He wants it back.  Too bad for him.  But I'm still nervous about it.  He called me a thief.  Bastard.  I had every right to it.  And I needed it.  I feel like I'm trying to rationalize, but I'm just trying to explain to myself and everyone else that I had every right to it.  Hell, I couldn't have cashed in the CD if I hadn't.  Fuck.  I hate when he makes me feel like this.

He's done nothing but verbally abuse me for nearly ten years, and when I get sick of it and take off he makes me feel like an asshole.  There is no reason I should let him get to me this way, but I can't help it.  He's been the source of almost all my guilt for a long time.  I hate guilt.  But life goes one.

I also set up an appointmet with an attorney to discuss my options on a loan my uncle is not repaying.  It really pisses me off to have to do this.  NEVER DO BUSINESS WITH FAMILY!!!  I'm probably going to have to forclose.  I don't care anymore.  I'll sell the house and the property and pay my damned taxes and tuition. 

I really do have one fucked up family.  At least I got the hell out of there.

5 comments:

autumnsavril said...

Yikes!  First off, *you gave your grandfather your new phone number????*  You left on bad terms.  He knows it.  You know it.  Why on earth didn't you keep that number to yourself?

Next, don't let him get to you.  He's still pissed that you left, and he knows you're nervous about being on your own and your emotions are vulnerable.  He's playing on that, and he knows it.  Don't let him make you feel bad because you needed *your* money to get a good start in life.  At least you're making an effort to be on your own, and that's good.  How on earth is he going to demand you give him your money back?

You're totally in the right, so don't let him bother you.  Really.  I know you barely know me, so my advice shouldn't really matter one way or the other, but seriously.  Logically, he has no right to your money and no right to your life, at this point.  You make your own decisions and your grandfather be damned.

Hahaha, I've NEVER loaned money to my family.  If I think they need something, I give it to them.  Whether it's in the form of an object they need for their home, food, or money, I always give it to them.  And never in huge quantities.  Never more than I'm prepared to give.  It's a good rule of thumb:  whatever you give to your family, do not expect it back.

Avril

autumnsavril said...

Yikes!  First off, *you gave your grandfather your new phone number????*  You left on bad terms.  He knows it.  You know it.  Why on earth didn't you keep that number to yourself?

Next, don't let him get to you.  He's still pissed that you left, and he knows you're nervous about being on your own and your emotions are vulnerable.  He's playing on that, and he knows it.  Don't let him make you feel bad because you needed *your* money to get a good start in life.  At least you're making an effort to be on your own, and that's good.  How on earth is he going to demand you give him your money back?

You're totally in the right, so don't let him bother you.  Really.  I know you barely know me, so my advice shouldn't really matter one way or the other, but seriously.  Logically, he has no right to your money and no right to your life, at this point.  You make your own decisions and your grandfather be damned.

Hahaha, I've NEVER loaned money to my family.  If I think they need something, I give it to them.  Whether it's in the form of an object they need for their home, food, or money, I always give it to them.  And never in huge quantities.  Never more than I'm prepared to give.  It's a good rule of thumb:  whatever you give to your family, do not expect it back.

Avril

autumnsavril said...

Sorry about the double comments, AOHell is at it again.

Avril

rampage841512 said...

First, let me thank you.  You may not think it, but what you said really helps.

Second, I didn't give him my new number, he called my cell phone.  The only way to change that number is to get a new contract and I'm not getting hooked for another two years.  I'm not dumb.  And he only called once, so it's okay.

autumnsavril said...

MEEEEP!  Sorry, I forgot yours was a cell phone.

Avril