Thursday, March 3, 2011

How many chances do you get?

I spend the vast majority of my time alone. While it is possible to share my hobbies and interests with others they are primarily solitary endeavors (reading, shooting, writing). 

I don't precisely want to spend all my time by myself but it becomes more and more clear to me that most of my closer friends have differing priorities and interests.  That's not to say I don't enjoy my time with them, but that even with that I still feel a considerable loneliness.  I don't feel like I'm a real part of the group.

I'm too young to be a bitter old man, but I feel like one and more and more I am acting like one.

I'm just so damned tired of being alone, but at the same time more willing to be alone than be with the wrong person. I don't know how to close that gap. Temporary fixes do more harm than good.

Oh, well. What's one more pile of stress? At this rate I'll have heart attack before 30 and not have to worry about it anymore.

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