Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Feeling good

I came home today feeling beat.  I showered and then passed out on my couch.  I slept for about four hours before John called me.  He got off work early and wanted to see if he and Jennifer could come over.  Since I don't have to work tonight I told him to come over.  He got here before he hung up.

After Jennifer got here we decided to go to the mall.  Jennifer wanted to trade out the jacket she had on lay-a-way for a larger size.  The sales ladies at the store, Wilson's Leather, are fucking bitches now.  They tried to give her hell about it, but she eventually got her way.  I'm not going to be buying anything there anymore though.  They were fucking rude.

We went into a couple of other stores too.  I bought a t-shirt from American Eagle that says 'Almost Handsome.'  I'm guessing it's a play on the movie Almost Famous.  I've never seen it, but I thought the shirt was funny, anyway.  After that we went into VS so Jennifer could buy some new panties.  She says since she has lost weight all of her panties are starting to fall off.  Maybe I'm just stupid or something, but I fail to see the problem.  Her husband is with me. 

We did, however, convince her to buy a couple of thongs.  She's always complained that they're uncomfortable.  We convinced her to try them for a week.  Every girl I've talked to says after a week she's never been bothered by a thong again. 

I can't believe I just wrote nearly two paragraphs about my friend's panties.  I guess there are worse things to talk about.  Anyway...

We went to this sporting goods store called Dick's after that.  When we got out I couldn't help but ask Jennifer what she and Falon had talked to Stephanie about.  Apparently Falon started telling Stephanie about how much I like her.  I interrupted Jennifer to ask her how Falon would know that.  Jennifer just gave me that look all women have, and said, "Robert, everyone knows." I hadn't known I'd been quite so...well, you know.  Anyway, she said Stephanie started saying, "He won't ever ask me out though..."  Jennifer asked her what she'd say if I did, and she told Jennifer that she would say yes.  Jennifer tells me she also said that if we got together it would probably be a long relationship too. 

Okay, given, I should take this in stride and not look too deeply into it, but I have to ask...Am I really that blind?  Or am I just stupid?  I guess it just goes to show you that you'll never know unless you take your shot.  It's still kind of hard to believe that this is happening.  And what could happen in time...that's just mind blowing.  I'm realistic, so don't get worried.  But I'm not going to worry about what could go wrong.  If I'm going to let my imagination run wild, which it does of it's own accord, I may as well imagine the things that could go right.  I can imagine the moments I hope we have in the future. 

The fact is, when it comes down to it, I want this to last for a long time too.  I want it to be a good thing for both of us.  I hope it is.  I know I'm getting ahead of myself.  I'll take it one step at a time, and do my best to go into this thing with no crazy expectations.  I'll hope for the best, and I'll look for the best, not the worst.  Yeah.  

Damn.  I want to describe this feeling.  I need too.  It's like finding out you've won the lottery.  You know you've won, but you have not even begun to figure out how you're going to cash the check, let alone spend it.  Now, really, it's nothing like that at all.  I don't know what it is yet.  But I've waited for this opportunity for a year now.  This is not some girl I met yesterday.  I've known her for while.  We've been friends in that time.  And I developed feelings for her.  At first, I admit, it was just a physical attraction.  That changed though.  And it scared the hell out of me when it did.

I don't know.  I'm just rambling.  And I'm hungry.  I need to eat something.  I'm feeling really good right now though.  Really good.  I like this feeling.  I'm hoping it lasts.  I want it to last forever. 

Now I'm into the crazy talk.  Anyway, I just hope I can, and/or do make Stephanie feel this way.  That would be nice, to know I make someone feel this way.

Okay, now I'm going to eat.  

And I'll enjoy this new adventure.

No comments: