Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Wednesday Night Adventure

Stephanie finally met John and Jennifer tonight.  I've been trying to introduce them for six months.  She got to meet Jeremy, which I was not exactly planning for jealous reasons.  I really need to get over that, but if he were to hook up with her I'd probably beat him to death and be too hurt to look at her.  Not that it would be any of my business, but it's a respect thing. 

Anyway, now that I've voiced my little insecurity, I guess I can get on to telling what we did.  Stephanie got here right after John, Jennifer, and Jeremy.  I introduced everyone and we sat around talking and watching Wheel of Fortune.  John and Jennifer had just come from his parent's house.  They had dinner there.  I ordered a pizza for me and Stephanie.

After we ate, we went to WalMart of all places.  Stephanie had to return a cat tree that her dad bought.  All five of us packed into my Civic, which wasn't so bad, except I didn't get to ride in the backseat with Stephanie and Jennifer.  Jeremy did.  I didn't like that.  Sorry, but I felt jealous.  I really like her as more than just a friend.  A lot more.  I can't help it, as much as I want too.  I don't like feeling jealous.

Anyway, after WalMart we went to Dairy Queen to get some Blizzards.  They were really good.  Only John, Stephanie, and I got one because Jennifer already had one today and Jeremy is weird.  We all got brownie batter, which is really good.  I didn't eat much of mine, but I enjoyed it.  I just didn't have much of an appetite after the pizza.

Having nothing else to do we decided to go to this 'novelty' shop called Love Stuff.  Stephanie had never been there before and Jennifer suggested we take her.  Since it was on the way, Stephanie asked to stop by her house so she could change into some pants and grab a jacket since the night was kind of cool.  Luckily, she is not like most women and didn't take long at all.

After getting our ID's checked after walking in the door, we browsed Love Stuff for about half an hour.  The place is pretty cool.  Lots of toys and clothes.  It's the place where strippers get all of thier outfits, but some of the stuff is pretty tasteful too.  Stephanie tried on this really nice pair of high heels.  They looked great on her, but she couldn't find her size.

Stephanie was also lookingfor something else she wanted.  She said she wanted to get this little finger vibrator she saw on tv or something.  It's cool she's comfortable wtih that kind of thing.  Another reason I like her, I guess.  She's not shy about sex.  I've always been turned off by people who have an immature attitude about sex.  I'm not saying that I'm bothered by people who are waiting, I just don't like people who don't have a mature attitude about it.

We came back to my apartment after that, since we had nothing else to do.  Stephanie left right after we got here because she has to work tomorrow.  It was fun though, except for my insecurity about Jeremy.  Why do I have to feel like an ass?  Because I'm a jealous bastard, and I'd like to have my shot at Stephanie and I don't want anymore interference than I already have.  Like I've got a chance anyway...

Maybe.  Fuck, I don't know.  She's got me all out of sorts.  I've got myself all out of sorts.  I've got that jealous, fearful, sick to my stomache feeling right now.  I guess I was nervous about Stephanie meeting John and Jennifer, and I didn't really think about her meeting Jeremy.  I wasn't expecting it, so maybe that's why it's got me a little weirded out.

It's cool though.  Jeremy's a good guy.  He knows the rules in these situations.  And I'll let him know that I really like her.  He wouldn't do anything uncool, same as I wouldn't if the situation was reversed.  That makes me feel a little better.  It's good to have friends you can trust to be cool.  I just hope I didn't step on his toes with Amanda and Tiffany.  But he said they were all just friends, and I didn't try anything anyway.  Just acted my perverted self.

Insecurity.  That's something I really need to work on.  It causes me a fuck-load of problems that I'd rather not have to deal with.  When it comes to sex, I'm secure.  Education, I'm secure.  Work, I'm secure.  Friendships, I'm secure.  But romantic relationships?  Very insecure in that department.  Need to work on that one.


autumnsavril said...

Hahaha, that last paragraph is funny to me, for some reason or other.

If Jeremy is as cool as you say he is, don't worry about the situation.  If Jeremy is as cool as you say he is, you have no reason to feel insecure.  Right?  Or do I have the situation twisted?


rampage841512 said...

You are completely right, and I felt better as soon as I wrote the entry.  I guess getting it out helped.